You didn’t really love me
I know you thought you did
But parents don’t hurt their children
In ways you often did
I grew detached from caring
From showing love or fear
From showing most emotions
I rarely even could
I found it hard to show my joy
Or to even show my pain
So often I would just be fine
In hiding on my own
I didn’t want people to know
I couldn’t love my dad
For if he really loved me
Who would have proved just that.
He would have stopped the drinking
He would have straightened his act
He might of even learnt
To let go of what burdened him.
He might have had some therapy
He might have tried again
But to this day he wallows
And cannot find his way
He’s too far in his black hole
Of burden shame and guilt
And nothing now can save him
Except his own free will
He’s brave
He’s smart
His clever
Yet he wastes it all the same
For facing his emotions
Brings far too greater pain
I’ve learnt from your mistakes though
I will not be the same
It takes me time to learn to
But I’ve learnt it all the same
I smile like I used to
When the world wasn’t just so tough
And I found my light to shine bright
and guide others through the dust
I might still have  way to go
But I’m further than I was
From loving who I am
For everything you’re not
I do not need a saviour to come and save the day
I need my own beliefs dear
And to know I am worthy to my name
As long as I believe in me
That’s all that really matters
If only you knew that just one change could really make your day
Be positive and strong dear
For not all dark is lost
For there is always light dear
Just look for it when you’re lost.
If you can see that light
The world is not so bad
Because everything can change dear
When your positive instead of sad
That doesn’t mean of course dear that you cannot feel so sad
It just means don’t you live there for life is not that bad
There is light and fun and laughter
and love there to be had
Open up your heart dear
You can save yourself at last.