I have had to learn and I am still learning how to be fatherless.
I know many others out there are too.

In many ways it made me who I am, it made me more understanding, I have always been sensitive but in truth
it taught me what that meant.

It taught me that sensitivity is strength.

It taught me that to forgive is freedom.

It taught me that love, compassion – all of those good things – that giving them out without limit or expectation
can be just as healing as recieving them.

After many many years and a few extra lessons of my own, it taught me that you dont need a man to save or define you
but that it is ok to let them help you, you don’t have to be strong on your own, its nice to share your journey with
someone, you just have to find someone who you trust and whos heart and intentions are pure. Someone who puts in the effort and who you put in the effort for. Someone who accepts your light and dark and who you do the same, where you both understand life is not a flat line of mundane but an every changing graph of ups and downs but that when you stick with eachother and work at it you can get through anything.

Through process and a few added things I have begun, slowly, to learn not to tarnish all men with the same brush.

I have also learnt to judge less.
You don’t know what people have gone through that’s brought them to where they are, that makes them react how they do,
what lead to the coping mechanisms they have ended up with to get through life or why things you cant understand set
off emotional triggers.

I have learnt to listen when someone is prepared to speak.

Compassion, honesty, authenticity and communication! THAT is how we make it through this life.
That is how we make real, honest, life long connections!

So, thank you,
for the memories we shared, good or bad.
for you absence it pushed me to understand myself.
and in truth:
i hope you find peace
i hope you heal
i hope you can see that no matter what, how bad things have been –
you have the power to turn things around!
you have the power to fix your life..

x